aerika: (Default)
Trying to get my enrollment in order for this year with a little trepidation. The head of my field is a little doubtful that I can do if full-time since I work and the courseload is more than a full-time job. I would agree except..I'm 30. Years. Old. Haha, I'm outta time baby. If I go part-time I'll be in school for 16 years just to get where I'm going and that's just not feasible. I'm hoping I'll be able to push myself to do BioMed for 3 years full-time and another 3-4 years in Medical School. Then another year Since I want to do Med School full-time as well this course will be a good trial to see if I can hack it. At the same time I have to work. I know that American women often work 60-80 hours a week or something because they have to. Well, I have to. I'm nervous though. So far the plan is:

BioMed: 3 years
Medical School: 4 years
Intern: 1 year
Residency: 1 year
GP Registrar: 2 years

I also want to have a kid but I'll be 37 once I finish Medical School and start earning money from the job so I think I might miss out on having a kid. I'll just have to get a bunch of cats to make up for it. Unless I get a good paying job in Biomedical Science and do Med School part-time which is an option but one I really don't like since I want to be there for my kid. Option 2 is to work in BioMed and delay Medical School until my kid is school age at which point, go in part-time. That would put this whole process as 17 years. It also means I'll have to struggle to pay for the things my kid needs.

The first plan seems to be the best option. I've been grieving for my inability to be the parent I want to be since I started suspecting I wouldn't be able to do both. One of the reasons I went this direction was so I could work part-time and still afford to raise a child on my own. Another reason is so I can financially support my parents when they reach the age where that's necessary. Another is because I just love Medicine.

There is still the possibility of having kids after the first 8 years and that seems to be the option I'll be looking at. I love being single but I know I'll also deeply regret not having kids since I already feel the maternal need.

(whines) it's hard getting old. Where's that immortality vaccine?

Weight Loss

Jan. 9th, 2017 06:10 pm
aerika: (Default)
Weeelll. I forgot to weight myself this week but I'm pretty sure it didn't change. I learnt this week that I need to stay away from Youtube. I found Divorce Court at Christmas and I've been thoroughly addicted since. I don't even know why. Sat on my ass so much this last week I can't believe I'm still capable of walking.

Also, I need to have a lot of food precooked and ready to go or I'm going for the snacks, and the snacks have to be there for a working woman so I can't get rid of them. I completely failed at eradicating caffeine which my body hates. So we'll be trying again this week. At least I avoided chocolate and most junk food. But I've been (TMI) on that vampire time of month and I haven't. Stopped. Eating.

Another problem: Realm Of The Mad God. Holy shit that game is fucking sinful. Go on when you have a spare half hour and three hours later you're swearing at the screen and sobbing over the special gear you just lost.

On the productive side, I have been working on sketching. Thoroughly terrible at it as usual but I find it incredibly enjoyable. Might share my lack of talent eventually. This kind of bad needs preservation so you can show your art teacher that not everyone is capable of drawing like they used to tell me. Didn't realise how much time it consumed until I started learning, but it's also very relaxing.

Just gotta try for a loss this week.
aerika: (Default)
So Sunday's are my weight day. Once a week I'll update with my weight loss/gain and maybe what I learnt.

Starting Weight: 134.7 kgs
First Major Goal: 120 kgs

Wish me luck!

New Year

Jan. 1st, 2017 05:18 pm
aerika: (Default)
Soooo. Last year was both interesting and boring. Now I'm looking at a new year and as a believer in a fresh start and fresh perspective, resolutions are my shit.

So first up is the same resolution I've been making since I was 13. Lose weight. I am fatty fat fat and have been since I was a teenager. I don't actually eat high cal foods. But my body has trouble losing weight if I eat carbs of any sort. I can't eliminate carbs because my wallet wouldn't like it. But I can drop them low as I can.

For weight loss, I could write a book on what I know. But I also have Irritable Bowel Syndrome (lovely topic, I know). IBS means that I can't eat a variety of foods. Fruit and vegetables, wholegrains and dairy. Everything is highly restricted. The last time I tried a low calorie diet I failed because no matter what I did I was always starving.

So what's can I do differently? Well, I can try and keep all food after 4 to veg. This will give me a chance to feel sick if I have to or experiment with counters before work the next day.

But this is my final try. I'm 30 now and I've been having weight problems since my mid-teens. I have to acknowledge that with help and without it, success escapes me. So here's the second part to make this no-fail: I'm going to get private health insurance and if I haven't been having consistent weight loss in the year I have to wait, I'm going in for weight loss surgery.

Time to shit or get off the pot.


I've always wanted to draw but I'm not any good. I started teaching myself around October last year and I want to continue until I get good enough to satisfy my urge to draw.


More than a decade in fandom and I still haven't written anything for it. And this is from the girl who's been writing since she was 5 years old. I have a fanfic I started at the end of last year and my goal is to finish it this year. I don't want to post it until I've finished it since WiP's are evil.


Picked my first tatt. All that's left to do is save the money for it. I'm a total wimp with GAD so I'm sure the tattoist will love me. But I'm hoping I'm able to stand the pain since I want to get a half sleeve and a few other pieces around my body. We'll see how it goes.


So I'm not all that smart. It takes a while to get things stuck in my brain. But I've decided to pretend I'm smart and do a high intensity science course this year. Should be interesting.


aerika: (Default)

January 2017

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